Raymond and Nick: Riverside Romance
As the gents tell us, their relationship started "like all modern love stories, on a dating app". It was because of this dating app that love grew between Raymond and Nick, and after a bit of chasing around the country, Raymond and Nick finally moved in together. And so their story begins.
Location Eurobin, Vic | Photographer Zoe Louise Photography
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How and when did you meet?
Raymond: We met, like all modern love stories, on a dating app while I was travelling around the country as a performer in 2018. Nick then proceeded to follow me around the country, and even though it made no logical sense – not to mention it was way too soon - I left my tour to come live with him in Melbourne.
Nick: We met through Grindr. At first, Raymond ignored me, so I had to double message him. When he replied with a lovely message as to why he hadn’t first replied, I then responded with “pics”. We met one random Wednesday night, and instead of it being another passing encounter, I chased Raymond around the country while he was touring with children’s theatre, and that’s how it all started.
Tell us a little about the first time you met?
Raymond: The first time Nick and I met he came over to the Airbnb I was staying at. As soon as we got some time alone, we both just poured our hearts out, and I found myself telling him so much about myself. I knew immediately that this man was special and that he and I were going to hit it off.
Nick: The first time Raymond and I met, it was meant to be just for sex. I went over to his Airbnb at around 8pm, and we chatted until around 3am. We ended up having sex, and it was great, and then I had to leave. When I got home at around 5am I woke up my housemates, I was so excited because I knew I had met someone special. They weren’t too happy about me waking them up.
What was the first thing you noticed about each other?
Raymond: Nick had the most beautiful face that I had ever seen, such kind eyes and such a beautiful bright smile that just lit up the room. I also remember thinking he was so put together and levelheaded, the kind of person I could talk to for hours and just tell him everything without facing judgement.
Nick: The first thing that I noticed about Raymond was his eyes. They are this warm brown and are very inviting and kind, which is indicative of him. He never has a bad word to say about anyone and could talk to a stranger about anything with no judgment.
Tell us about the standout moments in your relationship?
Raymond: One of my favourite memories with Nick was when we first moved in together, we managed only to fight once, which must be a miracle? I remember walking around the place, and for the first time in years, I finally had somewhere to call home. That night we ordered pizza, got drunk on wine, and it was one of the best nights of my life.
Have you ever faced any issues of non-acceptance?
Nick: Some celebrants that we spoke to were really thrown that we were a same-sex couple and didn’t know how to manage that situation. This happened very early on in the wedding planning, and one celebrant made a subtle homophobic comment that upset me a lot. After that, every time I contacted a vendor, I got a bit anxious at mentioning it was a same-sex wedding, which is why we got a lot of our vendors through recommendations from friends.
What does marriage mean to you?
Raymond : It is about celebrating love, a commitment always to be honest, loyal, and supportive – no matter how hard things get. Marriage is a bond with somebody that makes them family, makes them your safe space because you know that this amazing human will have your back when it might feel like the rest of the world is fighting against you. Making this commitment was not something I had ever planned or envisioned, but with Nicholas, I can honestly say that nothing has ever felt so right.
Who proposed? and how?
Raymond: I proposed to Nick, and it was supposed to be on a beautiful mountain top where my late grandmothers’ ashes had been scattered many years ago. It was special to me because my grandmother was the first person to accept me as bisexual and told me that she would love me, and the person I love, regardless of who they are or how they identify. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of taking my parents beaten up old Mazda, and on the way there we broke down, and I ended up proposing to him on the side of the highway in Coolum.
When did you get married?
We got married in March 2019, on a beautifully warm and sunny afternoon, right before COVID19 proceeded to shut down the world around us.
We were really lucky with the timing. A couple of weeks before the town had been evacuated due to fires, then the property flooded and then after the wedding, the COVID19 lockdowns happened.
Raymond and Nicholas’ story continues below ↓
What was the main influence behind your wedding day?
Raymond Nick was the mastermind behind it all. We decided together that we wanted everything to be relaxed, not too formal, surrounded by nature and not too big.
Nick: The main influence around the day was the location. We had it on my dad's property which is one of my favourite places in the world and a real safe place for me. I wanted to share that with our guests, and the theme of the wedding stemmed from having it outside by the river that ran through the property. Raymond contributed to the wedding planning by dealing with me being stressed out over the budget, guest lists and vendors.
What was the most important thing to you surrounding your wedding?
Raymond That Nick felt loved and supported in whatever decisions he wanted to make leading up to the day. By supporting each other, we came up with a lot of awesome ideas that we had not considered when sitting down to plan.
Nick: The most important thing for me on the day was not to be stressed or anxious. So much planning and contingency planning was done that the wedding party had strict instructions that if there was a problem to not come to me with it unless they had a solution. Looking back, that was maybe a bit bridezilla but all I wanted out of my day was to be happy and marry Raymond, which happened, so the day was perfect for me.
Where did you find the bulk of your inspiration?
Raymond: We found that the location inspired us a lot when we started to create an aesthetic for our wedding. We started by designing our invitations to compliment the beautiful hills that surrounded Eurobin. When we were not creating things from that, we were looking at websites which offered a lot of simple suggestions that added to the beauty that came to fruition on the day.
Nick: I spent lots of time scrolling through Instagram and BuzzFeed wedding lists.
How did you choose your suppliers?
Raymond: It was a mix of suggestions from friends, random people we had met who happened to either be suppliers or know suppliers and a lot of late nights in front of the computer scrolling the internet.
Any standout suppliers?
Raymond: Everybody was raving about our photographer, she made everybody feel so comfortable, and she was so good at getting all the beautiful shots. We have a few friends who have gotten engaged since, and they have even booked her. We also really enjoyed Vinbar who provided the drinks service, they also served quality banter and a tonne of charisma. They even kept a bottle of champagne hidden for me during the reception, which I thoroughly enjoyed.
Nick: Everyone we dealt with was amazing. The biggest standout for the day would have had to be Zoe, the photographer. I get uncomfortable kissing or being affectionate in public. I think a lot of it comes from trying to hide my sexuality growing up and into my early adulthood. So to kiss and be romantic and then have someone taking photos of you made me uncomfortable at first. Zoe was fantastic and instantly put me at ease. Her energy was great, and she was always calm and patient. Considering we spent the most time with Zoe on the day outside of each other, I’m really glad that we chose her. She was a part of our day, and it wouldn’t have been the same if we had gone with a different photographer. The guests all loved her too, I know one has already booked her for their wedding.
The florist was also great. I somehow forgot about the flowers and contacted Ben in a panic outlining that this is everything I’d organised and if he could arrange table garlands to work with that. He was quick to reply, and it was all arranged and booked in within a couple of hours. The end result was also stunning and elevated the look of the whole wedding. Ben was also really kind and professional, and I loved the flowers, the were fresh and he took real care, love and pride in his work and it showed on the day.
Did you find it difficult to translate more common traditions into a ‘same-sex’ wedding?
Nick: we just made up our rules and did what felt right to use which was nice.
What was the most difficult thing about planning your wedding?
Raymond: I grew up moving around a lot and I, unfortunately, did not spend a lot of time with the same family or support group around me. Having to uproot my life so many times because of other people’s decisions made me so terrified of ever relying on people to be there for me or to show up. I never wanted to get married because I did not think there would be anyone that would even care to celebrate my partner and myself, and I knew I wouldn’t have much – if any – family that would come. Thankfully my friends and my close siblings proved me wrong and looking out on their smiling/crying faces just overwhelmed me most amazingly.
Nick: The most challenging thing for me was to stay within budget. FOr every big ticket item I would look at the prettiest or most expensive one and tell myself that it was worth it for this one day. Next minute I had blown the budget.
Where did you spend your honeymoon?
We spent our honeymoon in lockdown because of COVID. We were lucky enough to stay on the property that we had the wedding on for that period and meant that we could spend some time together and unwind in solitude.
Any advice for other couples planning their day and finding it challenging to navigate the journey?
Raymond: always communicate with each other on everything, I think it is important that all parties involved feel that their opinions are respected. Make the most of everything because before you know it, it is all over. Finally, I would say remind yourself of why you’re doing this, you love this person(s) so much and how amazing is it that you’ll get to spend a whole day dedicated to celebrating that love.
Nick: When selecting our wedding party, make an effort for them to get to know each other and become friends. This made the day a lot more fun for us. And don’t put anyone in your wedding party that dislikes your partner.
Suppliers
Photographer Zoe Louise Photography
Venue GGs By The River
Suits Calibre
Flowers Wild Blooms Floristry
Celebrant Bearded Celebrant
Catering Ashlar Woodfire Mobile Pizza
Furniture Heartwood Hire
Alcohol VinBar Albury
Marquee Under the Sky
Music Hey Jack Entertainment
Photobooth RBR Event Hire
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