Antonio and Tommaso: An Italian Love Affair
The simple act of losing one's keys is how it all started for Antonio and Tommaso back in 2015. After 4 years of dating and an Eiffel Tower proposal, these two Italian gents married in the Tuscan countryside.
Photographer Carlotta Nucci and Emiliano Cribari | Location Toscana Resort Castelfalfi, Tuscany
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How and when did you meet?
Antonio: In 2015, we were both working at the Universal Exposition in Milan. Tommaso was part of the staff of Expo Milano 2015, while I worked inside the exhibition site for a company sponsoring the event.
One day I lost the keys to my car and Tommaso helped me find them. In return, he asked for a dinner date with me.
Tell us a little about the first time you met?
Tommaso: The first time I met Antonio I thought he had his head in the clouds. Not only had he lost the keys of his car, but he insisted that the ones I found were not his.
I think he probably got a little excited because of me: I swear that usually of the two, I am the one with my head in the clouds.
What was the first thing you noticed about each other?
Tommaso: I was immediately drawn in by his smile, and his chipped left incisor tooth I think. But everything else as well.
Antonio: I thought he wasn’t my type, and also a big talker, but he could be a one night adventure. It didn’t take long for me to think he could be my life adventure.
What does marriage mean to you?
Antonio: The true meaning of marriage to us is giving a name to what binds us. We decided to get married for a matter of certainties, equal rights, transparency and consistency with what we have built till now.
Who proposed and how?
Antonio: In November 2018, we went to Paris for a few days. I had already carefully planned the moment of my surprise proposal to Tommaso.
Approaching the Eiffel Tower, I panicked when I realized that I had underestimated the security issue: the climb to the top of the tower was in fact preceded by a check-in through which it was compulsory to empty our pockets before passing. This would have meant showing the box that contained the ring, thus ruining the surprise.
Fortunately, I also underestimated the eternal distraction of Tommaso, always busy taking pictures in Paris.
Reaching the top of the Eiffel Tower, with Paris at our feet, I knelt down and made my proposal. In the end, I thought that something traditional could not be that bad.
When did you get married?
Antonio: We married on 13th July 2019. Tommaso wanted more time to organise the wedding in all its details, that would have meant to postpone the wedding in the summer of 2020, but I insisted to get married in 2019. The worldwide pandemic which we have all felt confirms the fact I’m always right.
Antonio and Tommaso’s story continues below ↓
What was the main influence behind your wedding day?
Tommaso: We were not influenced by something or someone particularly, we thought how we wanted our day and how our guests would like it.
In Italy, often weddings last all day long but, to us, this can be very tiring for guests.
We really wanted a guest friendly wedding, that’s what influenced mostly of our choices. We decided to get married in the late afternoon when the heat of summer takes a break, we chose to have a photo reportage during the party instead of a posing photoshoot in order to avoid leaving our guests after the ceremony, and we decided to offer a typical Tuscan market dinner with stalls of different dishes from the region and no wait for service. Everyone could choose what and how to eat and with whom to spend the dinner sitting at the table.
What was the most important thing to you surrounding your wedding?
Antonio: Absolutely our families and friends that wanted to share with us the happiness of that day.
After dinner, we also thought to surprise our guests: Tommaso sang his version of Cherry Ghost's "People Help the People", while I, at his side, leafed through thank-you signs for the support and affection of all our loved ones.
Having them all close around us at the time was very exciting.
Where did you find the bulk of your inspiration?
Antonio: The inspiration behind our wedding was precisely the Tuscan countryside. From the food served that referred to the regional culinary tradition, also revisited, to the floral arrangement in country chic style with a strong presence of olive trees.
We chose the olive tree both for the reference to the Tuscan hills, and for an emotional connection; Tommaso's family owns an olive grove from which they produce an exceptional olive oil that we also decided to gift to the guests as a souvenir of our wedding. Last but not least, the meaning of the olive tree, a symbol of peace and solidity.
How did you choose your suppliers?
Tommaso: We got married at Toscana Resort Castelfalfi, a magnificent resort in a characteristic Tuscan village.
A dear friend of ours who works for the resort, Elisa, invited us in December 2018 to find out the details of the marriage proposal that just happened.
As soon as we arrived, the choice of location for our wedding seemed obvious to say the least. It was love at first sight.
We also decided that Elisa would be the perfect person to celebrate our union.
We chose all the other suppliers through the Resort, personal acquaintances (I’ve worked few years for events) and through the web, social media and Instagram that are always a very precious source.
Did you find it difficult to translate more common traditions into a ‘same-sex’ wedding?
Tommaso: No, indeed.. having no specific theme gave us the opportunity to put together a tailor made ceremony.
The ceremony was undoubtedly the most touching moment for us, and apparently also for the guests given the number of tears shed.
As there was no bride, we chose to involve in the ceremony only female people: wedding witnesses, celebrant, choristers and, of course, our mothers walked us down the aisle. With no bride dress, we thought this could be a funny way to compensate the lack and give our guests something to gossip about.
We chose readings about freedom to love, happiness and civil rights; issues that are very close to our hearts. We exchanged our promises and two witnesses read their thoughts on the love and friendship that has tied them to us since childhood. All interspersed with moments of live music that refer to the topics covered.
All this contributed to make the ceremony solemn and exciting.
Any surprises on your wedding day? Or anything that didn’t go to plan?
Tommaso: For sure, an all afternoon long rain on a midsummer day was a big surprise. It rained up to an hour before the ceremony. Luckily the Tuscan sun solves all the problems... and dries quickly.
What was the most difficult thing about planning your wedding?
Tommaso: the most difficult and tiring thing was putting together all the suppliers. As I’ve worked for many events, I thought that we could do it without a wedding planner, anyway I could have not be able to give the work to someone else and trust them totally, I confess I’m a bit obsessed with control…and that time has been very hard.
Where did you spend your honeymoon?
Antonio: For our honeymoon we chose South America. A 20-day tour in which we passed from the driest deserts of the Earth in northern Chile, to the boundless salt plateau in Bolivia, to the "End of the World" in Patagonia and to end a few days in romantic Buenos Aires.
Any advice for other couples planning their day and finding it difficult to navigate the journey?
Tommaso: The main advice I can give them is to organise the ceremony in great detail.
Apart from the Legal part needed to make the union, the ceremony can tell something about you, your story, issues you care about.
Choosing a celebrant close to the grooms and able to talk about them to their guests is certainly a good idea, as letting their loved ones speak.
Suppliers
Photographer Carlotta Nucci e Emiliano Cribari
Venue: Toscana Resort Castelfalfi
Suits Andrea Versali - Marco Monza
Flowers Simone Sardelli Fiori
Cars Porsche Macan
Chef Michele Rinaldi Chef
Cake Michele Rinaldi Chef
Stationery Elena Gervasi and TipoTipo Lab
Celebrant Elisa Biagini
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